May 22: Groups Guide

About This Guide: This weekly groups guide, “Life to the Full,” is designed as a companion to our Eastertide / Pentecost 2022 teaching series, fostering discussion, study, and prayer, especially in a group setting. Join a group for a meaningful way to connect to our community.


exploring resentment

Teaching Text: 1 Corinthians 13:1-13

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poorand give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.


Themes

Consider these themes and ask your group what else they see in the passage:

  • Resentment

  • Anger

  • Love

  • Forgiveness


Presence 

Take a moment of silence and think about these questions:

  • A practice of noticing:

  • Be quiet for about 2 minutes… 

  • Notice your breath. Notice your body. Notice your emotions. 

  • Notice what thoughts try to invade the silence. 

  • Simply pray this: I come to you as I am Lord. Thank you for loving me unconditionally.


Formation 

Thoughts and notes you can use for discussion:

  • Eastertide is about LIFE TO THE FULL that Jesus offers and the primary barriers to that FULL LIFE

  • Jesus is constantly trying to tell us and show us how kind the father is. 

    • Created us from love FOR LOVING RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM

    • In his likeness - be like him

    • Rule / exist / live in his way

    • But there is a BREAK DOWN THE LOVING INTIMACY WITH GOD

    • So WE CARRY A DISTORTED LIKENESS 

    • We no longer RULE AND LOVE THE WAY HE DOES

  • This text speaks about ways in which that loving relationship breaks down - how we are robbed of the abundant resurrection life God has for us

  • Resentment is simply defined as “a feeling of anger or displeasure about someone or something unfair towards me.”

  • The text can be divided into three:

    • Vs 1-3 - the futility of a life relationally disconnected

    • Vs 4-7 - Love and not love - what love looks like and does not look like. 

    • Vs 8 -12 - the resulting life of love 

  • A life disconnected from God is hollow. No matter how full or successful it seems

  • Resentment 

    • It sprouts in feeling unfairly treated. 

    • The age of continuous Comparison -

    • Comparison is no longer a momentary experience, but a perpetual state of being. (Caleb spoke on this last week)

    • We compare the best of what others have with the worst of what we have. It’s a lose lose battle.

    • We see ourselves as suffering. 

  • David Brooks writes… These seasons of suffering have a way of exposing the deepest parts of ourselves and reminding us that we’re not the people we thought we were. Some shrivel in the face of this kind of suffering. They seem to get more afraid and more resentful.

    • A culture of limitless promise: Entitlement 

    • We are driven by questions like how do I succeed? Which eclipses the “why am I doing this?” questions. 

  • We live in a meritocracy. We see people as having different values based on the elements that is praised by society. Wealth, status, gifting, success. 

    • the product of a meritocracy - is that you have a life that society loves but you dont. 

    • Because we LIVE IN A WORLD OF LIMITLESS PROMISE - we are at high risk of disappointment and resentment.

  • It takes root and blossoms by harboring those wrongdoings in a weaponizing way. 

  • The way resentment flourishes is when you consciously or subconsciously keep a record of the wrong in order to justify later attitudes or actions. 

  • When we later snub someone or gossip about them or dismiss them or slander them it is because we have an arsenal of thoughts to justify our actions and absolve ourselves. 

  • Sometimes we even call it sowing and reaping… or some other spiritual justification 

  • The good and bad things will pass, but that with remains is that which you built in the relationally connected framework of Jesus Gave us  - to love GOD and NEIGHBOR

  • David Brooks describes this kind of person: Every once in a while, I meet a person who radiates joy. These are people who seem to glow with an inner light. They are kind, tranquil, delighted by small pleasures, and grateful for the large ones. These people are not perfect. They get exhausted and stressed. They make errors in judgment. But they live for others, and not for themselves. They’ve made unshakable commitments to family, a cause, a community, or a faith. They know why they were put on this earth and derive a deep satisfaction from doing what they have been called to do. Life isn’t easy for these people. They’ve taken on the burdens of others. But they have a serenity about them, a settled resolve. They are interested in you, make you feel cherished and known, and take delight in your good. When you meet these people, you realize that joy is not just a feeling, it can be an outlook. There are temporary highs we all get after we win some victory, and then there is also this other kind of permanent joy that animates people who are not obsessed with themselves but have given themselves away.

  • 1 Corinthians 13

    • this is not a wedding text. Its a worldview text

    • It can be a wedding text if it informs your worldview of marriage 

    • Its more than a moral code or a manifesto - its a relational description of how we awe re meant to exist 

  • CONFESSION

  • RECOGNIZE places where we are building an empty life. 

    • what are you relying on for your value? 

    • Who around you seem more important than others? Why? 

    • Are you more concerned with if you succeed that’s why you are doing something? 

  • RECONNECT TO THE SOURCE OF LIFE - Created from Love for love.

  • Spiritual practices that connects us to the source of life

  • Generosity-  forgiving others and myself. 

  • Gratitude-  How can I be grateful for what I have? 


Love 

Read these notes and discuss the questions below:

  • Spiritual practices for this series: Gratitude and Generosity

  • During this series we will explore and practice together aspects of these two practices. It begins within our own hearts, cultivating Gratitude in our own hearts, yet it does not stop there but ultimately overflows and results in the practice of acts of generosity. 

  • Gratitude: 

    • Our world tells us incessantly how much we lack. Every ad, social media and our hearts alone are huge contributors to us believing a narrative that we dont have enough and that God has not been faithful. 

    • Express gratitude to God for what he has given you. Make a list every day for that which you are grateful for. 

  • Generosity:

    • Often we say or subconsciously believe that we don't have enough to be generous with, and that It will leave me lacking if I am generous. Our world then convinces us to hoard, to hold on, to self preserve. 

    • Against who do you harbour unforgiveness, resentment?

    • What failures of your own should you ask forgiveness for and forgive yourself? 

Pray for one another in the group.


Armistead Booker

I’m a visual storyteller, nonprofit champion, moonlighting superhero, proud father, and a great listener.